Wednesday, 3 June 2015

1509 (110) It often happens when one is ill, as in the case of Job in the Old testament, that as long as one can move about and work, everything is fine and dandy;

but when God sends illness, somehow or other, there are fewer friends about. But yet, there are some. They still take interest in our suffering and all that, but if God sends a longer illness, even those faithful friends slowly begin to desert us. They visit us less frequently, and often their visits cause suffering. Instead of comforting us, they reproach us about certain things, which is an occasion of a good deal of suffering. And so the soul, like Job, is alone; but fortunately, it is not alone, because Jesus-Host is with it. After having tasted the above sufferings and spent a whole night in bitterness, the next morning, when the chaplain [Father Theodore] brought me Holy Communion, I had to control myself by sheer effort of will to keep from crying out at the top of my voice, “Welcome, my true and only Friend.” Holy Communion gives me strength to suffer and fight. I wish to speak of one more thing that I have experienced: when God gives (111 ) neither death nor health, and [when] this lasts for many years, people become 336 accustomed to this and consider the person as not being ill. Then there begins a whole series of silent sufferings. Only God knows how many sacrifices the soul makes.