1751-1803

1751 + O Jesus, concealed in the Blessed Sacrament of the Altar, my only love and mercy, I commend to You all the needs of my body and soul. You can help me, because You are Mercy itself. In You lies all my hope. (113) [In the original there follows a complete blank page.] + (114) J. M. J. Cracow-Pradnik, June 2, 1938 Three-day Retreat. 1752 Under the direction of Master Jesus, who Himself commanded me to make this retreat, and who selected the days on which I was to make it; namely, the three days preceding Pentecost and who, Himself, conducted this retreat. However, I asked my confessor [probably Father Andrasz] whether I could make such a retreat, and I received his permission. I also asked Mother Superior [Irene] and received her permission too. I had resolved that I would not make the retreat unless I obtained the permission of the Superiors. I began a novena to the Holy Spirit, and waited for Mother Superior's answer. (115) I should be beginning the retreat today, but I have not yet received new of Mother Superior's decision. When I went to Church for the evening devotions, I saw the Lord Jesus during the litany. My daughter, we are beginning the retreat. I answered, “Jesus, my dearest Master, I ask Your forgiveness, but I cannot make the retreat, because I have received no news as to whether 385 Mother Superior allows it or not.” Do not worry, My daughter, the Superior has given her permission. You will learn of it tomorrow morning. But we are to start the retreat today. And indeed, Mother Superior had telephoned that evening to the sister who is looking after me during my illness [Sister David], asking her to tell me that I was allowed to make the retreat, but the sister had forgotten to tell me. It was only next morning that she told me, (116) and she was very apologetic that she had not told me the day before. I answered her, “Please do not worry. I have already started my retreat, according to the Superior‟s wish.” + The First Day. 1753 In the evening, Jesus gave me the subject for meditation. At the first moment, my heart was filled with fear and joy. Then I pressed myself close to His Heart, and the fear vanished; only joy remained. I felt entirely like a child of God, and the Lord said to me, Fear nothing. What has been forbidden to others has been given to you. The graces that are not given to other souls to discern, not even from a distance, nourish you every day, like the daily bread. 1754 Consider, My daughter, Who it is to whom your heart is so closely united by the vows. Before I made the world, I loved you with the love your heart is experiencing today and, throughout the centuries, (117) My love will never change. 1755 Application. At the very thought of Him to whom my heart is wedded, my soul entered into profound recollection, and the hour passed like a minute. In this state of recollection, I came to know the attributes of God. Burning with an inner fire of love, I went out to the garden to cool off; when I looked up at the heavens, a new flame of love flooded my heart. 1756 Then I heard the words: My daughter, have you exhausted the subject I gave you? If so, I'll give you a new one. I answered, “O Infinite Majesty, eternity will not be enough for me to come to know You….. But my love for You has become more intense. As a token of gratitude, I lay my heart at Your feet, like a rosebud. May its fragrance delight Your Divine Heart, now and for eternity…. What a paradise it is for a soul when the heart knows itself to be so loved by God…..” 1757 (118) Today, you will read chapter fifteen of the Gospel of Saint John. I want you to read it very slowly. Second Meditation. 1758 My daughter, consider the life of God which is found in the Church for the salvation andthe sanctification of your soul. Consider the use that you make of these treasures of grace, of these efforts of My love. 1759 Application: O most compassionate Jesus, I have not always known how to profit from these priceless gifts, because I have paid too little attention to the gift itself and too much to the vessel in which You were giving me Your gifts. My most sweet Master, it will be different from now on. I will put Your gifts to the best use of which my soul is capable. Living faith will support me. Whatever the form might be, under which You send me Your grace, I will accept it as coming directly from You, without considering the vessel in (119) which You send it. If it will 386 not always be within my power to accept it with joy, I will always accept it with submission to Your holy will. Conference on Spiritual Warfare.1760 My daughter, I want to teach you about spiritual warfare. Never trust in yourself, but abandon yourself totally to My will. In desolation, darkness and various doubts, have recourse to Me and to your spiritual director. He will always answer you in My name. Do not bargain with any temptation; lock yourself immediately in My Heart and, at the first opportunity, reveal the temptation to the confessor. Put your self-love in the last place, so that it does not taint your deeds. Bear with yourself with great patience. Do not neglect interior mortifications. Always justify to yourself the opinions of your superiors and of your confessor. Shun murmurers like a plague. (120) Let all act as they like; you are to act as I want you to. Observe the rule as faithfully as you can. If someone causes you trouble, think what good you can do for the person who caused you to suffer. Do not pour out your feelings. Be silent when you are rebuked. Do not ask everyone's opinion, but only theopinion of your confessor; be as frank and simple as a child with him. Do not become discouraged by ingratitude. Do not examine with curiosity the roads down which I lead you. When boredom and discouragement beat against your heart, run away from yourself and hide in My heart. Do not fear struggle; courage itself often intimidates temptations, and they dare not attack us.Always fight with the deep conviction that I am with you. Do not be guided by feeling, because it is not always under your control; but all merit lies in the will. Always depend upon your superiors, even in the smallest things. I will not delude you with prospects of peace (121) and consolations; on the contrary, prepare for great battles. Know that you are now on a great stage where all heaven and earth are watching you. Fight like a knight, so that I can reward you. Do not be unduly fearful, because you are not alone. Second Day. 1761 My daughter, today consider My Sorrowful Passion in all its immensity. Consider it as if it had been undertaken for your sake alone. 1762 Application: When I began to immerse myself in the Divine Passion, the great worth of the human soul and the great evil of sin were revealed to me. I understood that I did not know how to suffer. In order to gain merit from my suffering, I will unite myself more closely, in suffering, to the Passion of the Lord Jesus, asking of Him grace for dying souls, so that the mercy of God may embrace them in this grave moment. (122) Second Meditation 1763 My daughter, consider the rule and the vows which you have offered to Me. You know how highly I value them; all the graces that I have for the souls of religious are connected with the rule and the vows. 387 1764 Application: O my Jesus, I feel guilty of many imperfections on this score but, by Your grace I do not recall any conscious and voluntary transgression of the rule or the religious vows. Continue to guard me, O my good Jesus, for of myself I am weak. 1765 Today, My daughter, for your reading you shall take chapter nineteen of Saint John's Gospel, and read it, not only with your lips, but with your heart….. 1766 During this reading, my soul was filled with deep repentance. I saw all the ingratitude of creatures toward their Creator and Lord; I asked God to protect me from spiritual blindness. Conference on Sacrifice and Prayer. 1767 (123) My daughter, I want to instruct you on how you are to rescue souls through sacrifice and prayer. You will save more souls through prayer and suffering than will a missionary through his teachings and sermons alone. I want to see you as a sacrifice of living love, which only then carries weight before Me. You must be annihilated,destroyed, living as if you were dead in the most secret depths of your being. You must be destroyed in that secret depth where the human eye has never penetrated; then will I find in you a pleasing sacrifice, a holocaust full of sweetness and fragrance. And great will be your power for whomever you intercede. Outwardly, your sacrifice must look like this: silent, hidden, permeated with love, imbued with prayer. I demand, My daughter, that your sacrifice be pure and full of humility, that I may find pleasure in it. I will not spare my grace, that you may be able to fulfill what I demand of you. I will now instruct you on what (124) your holocaust shall consist of, in everyday life, soas to preserve you from illusions. You shall accept all sufferings with love. Do not be afflicted if your heart often experiences repugnance and dislike for sacrifice. All its power rests in the will, and so these contrary feelings, far from lowering the value of the sacrifice in My eyes, will enhance it. Know that your body and soul will often be in the midst of fire. Although you will not feel My presence on some occasions, I will always be with you. Do not fear; My grace will be with you…… Third Day. 1768 My daughter, in this meditation, consider the love of neighbor. Is your love for your neighbor guided by My love? Do you pray for your enemies? Do you wish well to those who have, in one way or another, caused you sorrow or offended you? Know that whatever good (125) you do to any soul, I accept it as if you had done it toMe. 1769 Application: O Jesus, my Love, You know that it has only been for a short while that I have acted toward my neighbor guided solely by Your love. You alone know of my efforts to do this. It comes to me more easily now, but if You Yourself did not kindle that love in my soul, I would not be able to persevere in this. This is due to Your Eucharistic love which daily sets me afire. Second Meditation. 388 1770 Now you shall consider My love in the Blessed Sacrament. Here, I am entirely yours, soul, body and divinity, as your Bridegroom. You know what love demands: one thing only, reciprocity……. 1771 Application: O my Jesus, You know that I desire to love you with a love that no soul (126) has ever before loved You with. I would like the whole world to be transformed into love for You, my Betrothed. You feed me with the honey and milk of Your Heart. From my earliest years, You reared me for Yourself alone, so that I would know how to love You now. You know that I love You, because You alone know the depth of the sacrifice I offer You each day. 1772 Jesus said to me, My daughter, have you any difficulties in this retreat? I answered that I hadn‟t. In this retreat, my mind is like lightning. I penetrate all the mysteries of faith with great ease. My Master and Leader, all darkness disappears from my mind under the ray of Your light. 1773 Today, for your spiritual reading, you will take the Gospel of Saint John, chapter twenty-one. Let it feed your heart more than your mind. 1774 (127) + During the June devotions, the Lord said to me, My daughter, My favor rests in your heart. When on Holy Thursday I left Myself in the Blessed Sacrament, you were very much on My mind. 1775 After these words, my love made great efforts to express to Him what He was to me, but I was at a loss for words and burst into tears in my helplessness. And Jesus said, For you, I am mercy itself; therefore I ask you to offer Me your misery and this very helplessness of yours and, in this way, you will delight My Heart. 1776 Today, a living flame of divine love entered my soul; if it had lasted any longer, I would have been consumed by the fire, freeing myself of the bonds of the present. It seemed to me that, if it had lasted an instant longer, I would have been drowned in the ocean of love. I cannot describe these arrows of love that pierce my soul. (128) + Conference on Mercy. 1777 My daughter, know that My Heart is mercy itself. From this sea of mercy, graces flow out upon the whole world. No soul that has approached Me has ever gone away unconsoled. All misery gets buried in the depths of My mercy, and every saving and sanctifying grace flows from this fountain. My daughter, I desire that your heart be an abiding place of My mercy. I desire that this mercy flow out upon the whole world through your heart. Let no one who approaches you go away without that trust in My mercy which I so ardently desire for souls. Pray as much as you can for the dying. By your entreaties, obtain for them trust in My mercy, because they have most need of trust, and have it the least. Be assured that the grace of eternal salvation for certain souls in their final moments depends on your prayer. You know the whole abyss of My mercy, (129) so draw upon it for yourself and especially for poor sinners. Sooner would heaven and earth turn into nothingness than would My mercy not embrace a trusting soul. 389 1778 My resolution continues to be the same: to unite myself to Christ-Mercy. Conclusion of the Retreat. Last Conversation with the Lord. 1779 Thank you, Eternal Love, for Your inconceivable kindness to me, that You would occupy Yourself directly with my sanctification. – My daughter, let three virtues adorn you in a particular way; humility, purity of intention and love. Do nothing beyond what I demand of you, and accept everything that My hand gives you. Strive for a life of recollection so that you can hear My voice, which is so soft that only recollected souls can hear it….. 1780 (130) I could not sleep until midnight today, so deeply was I stirred by tomorrow‟s renewal of vows. The greatness of God embraced my whole being. Pentecost [June 5, 1938]. Renewal of Vows. 1781 I got up much earlier than usual and went to the chapel, steeping myself in the love of God. Before receiving Holy Communion, I silently renewed my religious vows. After Holy Communion, the infinite love of God swept over me. My soul was in communion with the Holy Spirit, who is the same Lord as the Father and the Son. His breath filled my soul with such delight that it would be useless for me to try to give even a faint idea of what my heart experienced. Throughout the whole day, wherever I was and regardless of with whom I talked, a vivid presence of God accompanied me; my soul was drowned in thanksgiving for these great graces. 1782 (131) + When I went out to the garden today, the Lord said to me, Return to your room, for I will be waiting for you there. As soon as I returned, I saw the Lord Jesus, sitting at the table and waiting for me. He looked at me kindly and said, My daughter, I want you to write now, because that walk would not have been in conformity with My will. I remained alone and immediately got down to writing. 1783 + When I immersed myself in prayer and united myself with all the Masses that were being celebrated all over the world at that time, I implored God, for the sake of all these Holy Masses, to have mercy on the world and especially on poor sinners who were dying at that moment. At the same instant, I received an interior answer from God that a thousand souls (132) had received grace through the prayerful mediation I had offered to God. We do not know the number of souls that is ours to save through our prayers and sacrifices; therefore, let us always pray for sinners.1784 Today, in the course of a long conversation, the Lord said to me, How very much Idesire the salvation of souls! My dearest secretary, write that I want to pour out My divine life into human souls and sanctify them, if only they were willing to accept My grace. The greatest sinners would achieve great sanctity, if only they would trust in My mercy. The very inner depths of My being are filled to overflowing with mercy, and it is being poured out upon all I have created. My delight is to act in a human soul and to fill it with My mercy (133) and to justify it. My kingdom on earth is My life in the human soul. Write, My secretary, that I Myself am the spiritual guide of souls and I guide them indirectly through the priest, and lead each one to sanctity by a road known to Me alone. 390 1785 Mother Superior [Irene] visited me today, but only for a short while. When she looked around, she said that everything was too pretty here. It is true, the sisters are trying to make my stay in the sanatorium pleasant. But all this beauty does not lessen my sacrifice, which God alone can see and which will cease only when my heart stops beating. Neither the beauty of the whole earth, nor even of heaven itself, can blur the torture of my soul, which is real at each moment (134) though so deeply interior. It will end when You Yourself, Author of my suffering, say, “Enough.” There is nothing that could lessen my sacrifice. First Friday after Corpus Christi. [June 17, 1938] 1786 Right away, on the Friday after Corpus Christi, I felt so unwell that I thought the long-for moment was approaching. I had a high fever and spat up much blood during the night. Yet, I did go to receive the Lord Jesus in the morning, but I could not stay for the Holy Mass. In the afternoon, my temperature dropped suddenly to 35.8° C. I felt so weak that it was as if everything inside me were dying. But when I steeped myself in profound prayer, I understood that it was not yet the moment of deliverance, but only a closer call from my Bridegroom. 1787 When I met with the Lord, I said to Him, (135) “You are fooling me, Jesus; You show me the open gate of heaven, and again You leave me on earth.” The Lord said to me,
When, in heaven, you see these present days, you will rejoice and will want to see as many of them as possible. I am not surprised, My daughter, that you cannot understand this now, because your heart is overflowing with pain and longing for Me. Your vigilance pleases Me. Let My word be enough for you; it will not be long now. And my soul found itself once again in exile. I lovingly united myself to the will of God, submitting myself to His gracious decrees. 1788 + The conversations that I hear in this place about worldly matters make me so tired that I nearly faint. The sisters who nurse me have noticed this, because it shows outwardly. 1789 (136) + Today 253 I saw the glory of God which flows from the image. Many souls are receiving graces, although they do not speak of it openly. Even though it has met up with all sorts of vicissitudes, God is receiving glory because of it; and the efforts of Satan and of evil men are shattered and come to naught. In spite of Satan‟s anger, The Divine Mercy will triumph over the whole world and will be worshipped by all souls. 1790 I have come to know that, in order for God to act in a soul, it must give up acting on its own; otherwise, God will not carry out his will in it. 1791 When a great storm was approaching, I began to say the chaplet. Suddenly I heard the voice of an angel: “I cannot approach in (137) this storm, because the light which comes from her mouth drives back both me and the storm.” Such was the angel‟s complaint to God. I then recognized how much havoc he was to have made through this storm; but I also recognized that this prayer was pleasing to God, and that this chaplet was most powerful. 391 1792 I learned that a certain soul was very pleasing to God and that, in spite of all sorts of persecutions, God was clothing this person in a new and higher dignity. My heart greatly rejoiced in this. 1793 The moments which are most pleasant to me are those when I converse with the Lord within the center of my being. I try my very best not to leave Him alone. He likes to be always with us…… 1794 (138) + O Jesus, eternal God, thank you for Your countless graces and blessings. Let every beat of my heart be a new hymn of thanksgiving to You, O God. Let every drop of my blood circulate for You, Lord. My soul is one hymn in adoration of Your mercy. I love You, God, for Yourself alone. 1795 My God, although my sufferings are great and protracted, I accept them from Your hands as magnificent gifts. I accept them all, even the ones that other souls have refused to accept. You can come to me with everything, my Jesus; I will refuse You nothing. I ask You for only one thing: give me the strength to endure them and grant that they may be meritorious. Here is my whole being; do with me as You please. 1796 (139) Today, 254 I saw the Sacred Heart of Jesus in the sky, in the midst of a great brilliance. The rays were issuing from the Wound [in His side] and spreading out over the entire world. 1797 Today, the Lord came to me and said, My daughter, help Me to save souls. You will go to a dying sinner, and you will continue to recite the chaplet, and in this way you will obtain for him trust in My mercy, for he is already in despair. 1798 Suddenly, I found myself in a strange cottage where an elderly man was dying amidst great torments. All about the bed was a multitude of demons and the family, who were crying. When I began to pray, the spirits of darkness fled, with hissing and threats directed at me. The soul became calm and, filled with trust, rested in the Lord. At the same moment, I found myself again in my own room. How this happens…. I do not know. + 1799 (140) J.M.J. I feel that there is a power which is defending me and protecting me from the blows of the enemy. It guards and defends me. I feel it very distinctly; it is as if I am being shielded by the shadow of his wings. 1800 My Jesus, You alone are good. Even if my heart were to make every effort to write of Your goodness, at least in part, I could not do so – this is beyond all our comprehension. 1801 One day during Holy Mass, the Lord gave me a deeper knowledge of His holiness and His majesty, and at the same time I saw my own misery. This knowledge made me happy, and my soul drowned itself completely in his mercy. I felt enormously (141) happy. 392 1802 On the following day, I had a clear awareness of the following words: “You see, God is so holy, and you are sinful. Do not approach Him, and go to Confession every day.” And indeed, whatever I thought of seemed to me to be a sin. But I did not omit going to Holy Communion, and I resolved to go to Confession at the prescribed time, as I had no clear impediment. But when the day for confession came, I prepared a whole mass of those sins of which I was to accuse myself. However, in the confessional, God allowed me to accuse myself of only two imperfections, despite my efforts to make a confession according to what I had prepared. When I left the confessional, the Lord said to me, My daughter, all those sins you intended to confess are not sins in My eyes; (142) that is why I took away your ability to tell them. I understood that Satan, wanting to disturb my peace, has been giving me exaggerated thoughts. O Savior, how great is Your goodness! 1803 One day, when I was preparing for Holy Communion and noticed that I had nothing to offer Him, I fell at His feet, calling down all His mercy upon my poor soul: “May Your grace, which flows down upon me from Your Compassionate Heart, strengthen me for the struggle and sufferings, that I may remain faithful to You. And, although I am such misery, I do not fear You, because I know Your mercy well. Nothing will frighten me away from You, O God, because everything is so much less (143) than what I know [Your mercy to be] – I see that clearly.” [Here ends the sixth and last notebook]