1804-1828

My Preparation for Holy Communion

394 (1 ) + J.M.J. Cracow, January 10, 1938 My Preparation for Holy Communion Sister Maria Faustina of the Blessed Sacrament Congregation of the Sisters of Our Lady of Mercy 395 1804 (2) The most solemn moment of my life is the moment when I receive Holy Communion. I long for each Holy Communion, and for every Holy Communion I give thanks to the Most Holy Trinity. If the angels were capable of envy, they would envy us for two things; one is the receiving of Holy Communion, and the other is suffering. 1805 1. + Today, I am preparing myself for Your coming as a bride does for the coming of her bridegroom. He is a great Lord, this Bridegroom of mine. The heavens cannot contain Him. The Seraphim who stand closest to Him cover their faces and repeat unceasingly: Holy, Holy, Holy. This great Lord is my Bridegroom. It is to Him that the Choirs sing. It is before Him that the Thrones bow down. By His splendor the sun is eclipsed. And yet this great Lord is my Bridegroom. My heart, desist from this profound meditation on how others adore him, for you no longer have time for that, as He is coming and is already at your door. 1806 I go out to meet Him, and I invite Him to the dwelling place of my heart, humbling myself profoundly before His majesty. But the Lord lifts me up from the dust and invites me, as His bride, to sit next to Him and to tell Him everything (3) that is on my heart. And I, set at east by His kindness, lean my head on His breast and tell Him of everything. In the first place, I tell Him things I would never tell to any other creature. And then, I speak about the needs of the Church, about the souls of poor sinners and about how much they have need of His mercy. But the time passes quickly. Jesus, I muyst go to carry out the duties that are awaiting me. Jesus tells me that there is still a moment in which to say farewell. A deep mutual gaze, and we seemingly separate for a while; but, in reality, we never do. Our hearts are constantly united. Though outwardly I am distracted by my various duties, the presence of Jesus plunges me constantly in profound recollection. 1807 2. + Today, my preparation for the coming of Jesus is brief, but imprinted deeply with vehement love. The presence of God penetrates me and sets aflame my love for Him. There are no words; there is only interior understanding. I drown completely in God, through love. The Lord approaches the dwelling of my heart. After receiving Communion, I have just enough presence of mind to return to my kneeler. At the same time, my soul (4) is completely lost in God, and I no longer know what is going on about me. God gives me an interior knowledge of His Divine Being. These moments are short, but penetrating. The soul leaves the chapel in profound recollection, and it is not easy to distract it. At such times, I touch the ground with only one foot, as it were. No sacrifice throughout such a day is either difficult or burdensome. Every situation evokes a new act of love. 1808 3. + Today, I invite Jesus to my heart, as Love. You are Love itself. All heaven catches the flame from You and is filled with love. And so my soul covets You as a flower yearns for the sun. Jesus, hasten to my heart, for You see that, as the flower is eager for the sun, so my heart is for You. I open the calyx of my heart to receive Your love. 1809 When Jesus came to my heart, everything in my soul trembled with life and with warmth. Jesus, take the love from my heart and pour into it Your love, Your love which 396 is burning and radiant, which knows how to bear each sacrifice, which knows how to forget itself completely. Today, my day is marked by sacrifice….. 1810 (5) 4. + Today, I prepare for the Coming of the King. What am I, and who are You, O Lord, King of eternal glory? O my heart, are you aware of who is coming to you today? Yes, I know, but – strangely – I am not able to grasp it. Oh, if He were just a king, but He is the King of kings, the Lord of lords. Before Him, all power and dominion tremble. He is coming to my heart today. But I hear Him approaching. I go out to meet Him and invite Him. When He entered the dwelling of my heart, it was filled with such reverence that it fainted with fear, falling at His feet. Jesus gives her His hand and graciously permits her to take her place beside Him. He reassures her, saying, See, I have left My heavenly throne to become united with you. What you see is just a tiny part and already your soul swoons with love. How amazed will your heart be when you see Me in all My glory. 1811 But I want to tell you that eternal life must begin already here on earth through Holy Communion. Each Holy Communion makes you more capable of communing with God throughout eternity. And so, my King, I do not ask You for anything although I know that (6) You can give me everything. I ask You for one thing only: remain forever the King of my heart; that is enough for me. 1812 Today I am renewing my act of submission to my King, by faithfulness to interior inspirations. 1813 5. + Today, I am not forcing myself to make any special preparation. I cannot think of anything, though I feel many things. I long for the time when God will come to my heart. I throw myself in His arms and tell Him about my inability and my misery. I pour out all the pain of my heart, for not being able to love Him as much as I want. I arouse within myself acts of faith, hope and charity and live on that throughout the day. 1814 6. + Today, my preparation is brief. A strong and living faith nearly tears away the veil of love. The presence of God penetrates my heart as a ray from the sun penetrates crystal. At the moment when I receive God, all my being is steeped in Him. Amazement and admiration overwhelm me when I see God‟s great majesty, which stoops down to me who am misery itself. There bursts forth from my soul immense gratitude to (7) Him for all the graces that He imparts to me, and especially for the grace of being called to His exclusive service. 1815 7. + Today, in Holy Communion, I want to unite myself to Jesus as closely as possible, through love. I yearn for God so ardently that it seems to me that the moment will never come when the priest will give me Holy Communion. My soul falls as if into a swoon because of my longing for God. 1816 When I received Him into my heart, the veil of faith was torn away. I saw Jesus who said to me, My daughter, your love compensates Me for the coldness of many 397 souls. After these words, I was once again alone, but throughout the whole day I lived in an act of reparation. 1817 8. + Today, I feel an abyss of misery in my soul. I want to approach Holy Communion as a fountain of mercy and to drown myself completely in this ocean of love. When I received Jesus, I threw myself into Him as into an abyss of unfathomable mercy. And the more I felt I was misery itself, the stronger grew my trust in Him. In this abasement, I passed the whole day. 1818 (8) 9. + Today, my soul has the disposition of a child. I united myself to God as a child to its father. I feel completely like a child of God. 1819 When I had received Holy Communion, I had a deeper knowledge of the heavenly Father and of His Fatherhood in relation to souls. Today I live, glorifying the Holy Trinity. I thank God that He has deigned to adopt us as His children through grace. 1820 10.+ Today, I want to be transformed, whole and entire, into the love of Jesus and to offer myself, together with Him, to the Heavenly Father. During Holy Mass, I saw the Infant Jesus in the chalice, and He said to me, I am dwelling in your heart as you see Me in this chalice. 1821 After Holy Communion, I felt the beating of the Heart of Jesus in my own heart. Although I have been aware, for a long time, that Holy Communion continues in me until the next Communion, today – and throughout the whole day – I am adoring Jesus in my heart and asking Him, by His grace, to protect little children from the evil that threatens them. A vivid and even physically felt presence of God continues throughout the day and does not in the least interfere with my duties. 1822 (9) 11. + Today, my soul desires to show, in a special way, its love to Jesus. When the Lord entered my heart, I threw myself down at His feet like a rosebud. I want the fragrance of my love to rise continually to the foot of Your throne. You see, Jesus, in this rosebud, all my heart [offered] to You, not only now when my heart is burning like a live coal, but also during the day, when I will give You proofs of my love by faithfulness to divine grace. Today, all the difficulties and sufferings that I will encounter, I will quickly seize, like rosebuds, to throw at the feet of Jesus. Little matter that the hand, or rather the heart, bleeds…… 1823 12. + Today, my soul is preparing for the coming of my Savior, who is goodness and love itself. Temptations and distractions torment me and do not let me prepare for the coming of the Lord. Therefore I desire even more ardently to receive You, Lord, because I know that when You come, You will rescue me from these torments. And if it is Your will that I should suffer, well then, fortify me for the struggle. 398 Jesus, Savior, who have deigned (10) to come into my heart, drive away these distractions which are keeping me from talking to You. Jesus answered me, I want you to become like a knight experienced in battle, who can give orders to others amid the exploding shells. In the same way, My child, you should know how to master yourself amid the greatest difficulties, and let nothing drive you away from Me, not even your falls. Today, I have been struggling all day long with a certain difficulty about which You, Jesus, know…… 1824 13. + Today my heart trembles with joy. I desire very much that Jesus come to my heart. My longing heart is inflamed with an ever-increasing love. When Jesus came, I threw myself into His arms like a little child. I told Him of my joy. Jesus listened to these outpourings of my love. When I asked pardon of Jesus for not preparing myself for Holy Communion, but for continually thinking of sharing in this joy as soon as possible, He answered that Most pleasing to Me is this preparation with which you have received Me into your heart. Today, in a special way I bless this your joy. Nothing will disturb that joy throughout this day…… 1825 (11) 14. + Today, my soul is preparing for the coming of the Lord, who can do all things, who can make me perfect and holy. I am preparing very carefully for His reception, but there arose the difficulty as to how to present this to Him? I rejected it [this difficulty] at once. I will present it as my heart dictates. 1826 When I had received Jesus in Holy Communion, my heart cried out with all its might, “Jesus, transform me into another host! I want to be a living host for You. You are a great and all-powerful Lord; You can grant me this favor.” And the Lord answered me, You are a living host, pleasing to the Heavenly Father. But reflect: What is a host? A sacrifice. And so…..? O my Jesus, I understand the meaning of “host,” the meaning of sacrifice. I desire to be before Your Majesty a living host; that is, a living sacrifice that daily burns in Your honor. When my strength begins to fail, it is Holy Communion that will sustain me and give me strength. Indeed, I fear the day on which I would not receive Holy Communion. My soul draws astonishing strength from Holy Communion. O living Host, light of my soul! 1827 (12) 15. + Today, my soul is preparing for Holy Communion as for a wedding feast, wherein all the participants are resplendent with unspeakable beauty. And I, too, have been invited to this banquet, but I do not see that beauty within myself, only an abyss of misery. And, although I do not feel worthy of sitting down to table, I will however slip under the table, at the feet of Jesus, and will beg for the crumbs that fall from the table. Knowing Your mercy, I therefore approach You, Jesus, for sooner will I run out of misery than will the compassion of Your Heart exhaust itself. That is why during this day I will keep arousing trust in The Divine Mercy. 399 1828 16. + Today, the Majesty of God is surrounding me. There is no way that I can help myself to prepare better. I am thoroughly enwrapped in God. My soul is being inflamed by His love. I only know that I love and am loved. That is enough for me. I am trying my best to be faithful throughout the day to the holy Spirit and to fulfill His demands. I am trying my best for interior silence in order to be able to hear His voice……