801 Today, I still managed to pay a short visit to the Lord [in the Eucharist] before going to bed. My spirit was immersed in Him as in its only treasure. My heart rested a while near the Heart of my Spouse. I received light as to how I should behave toward those around me, and then I returned to my solitude. The doctor is taking good care of me; all those around me are very kind to me. 802 (200) December 10, . I got up earlier today and made my meditation before Holy Mass. Holy Mass is at six o'clock here. After Holy Communion my spirit was drowned in the Lord as in the sole object of its love. I felt absorbed by His omnipotence. When I came back to my private room, I felt sick and had to lie down at once. The sister150 brought me some medication, but I felt bad all day. In the evening, I tried to make a Holy Hour, but I could not do so; all I could do was united myself with the suffering Jesus. 803 My room is next to the men‟s ward. I didn‟t know that men were such chatterboxes. From morning till late at night, there is talk about various subjects. The women‟s ward is much quieter. It is women who are always blamed for this; but I have had occasion to be convinced that the opposite is true. It is very difficult for me to concentrate on my prayer in the midst of these jokes and this laughter. They do not disturb me when the grace of God takes complete possession of me. (201 ) because then I do not know what is going on around me. 804 My Jesus, how little these people talk about You. They talk about everything but You, Jesus. And if they talk so little [about You], it is quite probable that they do not think about You at all. The whole world interests them; but about You, their Creator, there is silence. Jesus, I am sad to see this great indifference and ingratitude of creatures. O my Jesus, I want to love You for them and to make atonement to You, by my love. Immaculate Conception of the Mother of God. 805 From early morning, I felt the nearness of the Blessed Mother. During Holy Mass, I saw Her, so lovely and so beautiful that I have no words to express even a small part of this beauty. She was all [in] white, with a blue sash around Her waist. Her cloak was also blue, and there was a crown on Her head. Marvelous light streamed forth from Her whole figure. I am the Queen of heaven and earth, but especially the Mother of your [Congregation]. She pressed me to Her heart and said, I feel constant compassion for you. I felt (202) the force of Her Immaculate Heart which was communicated to my soul. Now I understand why I have been preparing for this feast for two months and have been looking forward to it with such yearning. From today onwards, I am going to strive for the greatest purity of soul, that the rays of God‟s grace may be reflected in all their brilliance. I long to be a crystal in order to find favor in His eyes. 806 + That same day, I saw a certain priest [probably Father Sopocko or Father Andrasz] who was surrounded by the splendor which flowed from her; evidently, this soul loves the Immaculate One. 807 An extraordinary yearning fills my soul. I am surprised that it does not separate the soul from the body. I desire God; I want to become immersed in Him. I understand that I am in a terrible exile; my soul aspires for God with all its might. O you inhabitants of my fatherland, be mindful of this exile! When will the veils be lifted for me as well? Although 206 I see (203) and feel to a certain extent how very thin is the veil separating me from the Lord, I long to see Him face to face; but let everything be done according to Your will. 808 December 11. I could not assist at the whole Mass today; I assisted at only the most important parts, and after receiving Holy Communion I immediately returned to my solitude. The presence of God suddenly enveloped me, and at the same moment I felt the Passion of the Lord, for a very short while. During that moment, I attained a more profound knowledge of the work of mercy. 809 During the night, I was suddenly awakened and knew that some soul was asking me for prayer, and that it was in much need of prayer. Briefly, but with all my soul, I asked the Lord for grace for her.
810 The following afternoon, when I entered the ward, I saw someone dying, and learned that
the agony had started during the night. When I verified it – it had been at the time when
(204) I had been asked for prayer. And just then, I heard a voice in my soul: Say the chaplet which I taught you. I ran to fetch my rosary and knelt down by the dying
person and, with all the ardor of my soul, I began to say the chaplet. Suddenly the dying
person opened her eyes and looked at me; I had not managed to finish the entire chaplet
when she died, with extraordinary peace. I fervently asked the Lord to fulfill the promise
He had given me for the recitation of the chaplet. The Lord gave me to know that the
soul had been granted the grace. He had promised me. That was the first soul to
receive the benefit of the Lord‟s promise. I could feel the power of mercy envelop that
811 When I entered my solitude, I heard these words: At the hour of their death, I defend as My own glory every soul that will say this chaplet; or when others say it for a dying person, the indulgence is the same. When (205) this chaplet is said by the bedside of a dying person, God‟s anger is placated, unfathomable mercy envelops the soul, and the very depths of My tender mercy are moved for the sake of the sorrowful Passion of My Son.
Oh, if only everyone realized how great the Lord‟s mercy is and how much we all need
that mercy, especially at that crucial hour!
812 + Today I have fought a battle with the spirits of darkness over one soul. How terribly
Satan hates God‟s mercy! I see how he opposes this whole work.
813 + O merciful Jesus, stretched on the cross, be mindful of the hour of our death. O
most merciful Heart of Jesus, opened with a lance, shelter me at the last moment of
my life. O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fount of
unfathomable mercy for me at the hour of my death, O dying Jesus, Hostage of
mercy, avert the Divine wrath at the hour of my death.
814 (206) + December 12, . Today, I only received Holy Communion and stayed for
a few moments of the Mass. All my strength is in You, O Living Bread. It would be
difficult for me to live through the day if I did not receive Holy Communion. It is my
shield; without You, Jesus, I know not how to live.
815 Jesus, my Love, today gave me to understand how much He loves me, although there
is such an enormous gap between us, the Creator and the creature; and yet, in a way,
there is something like equality: loves fills up the gap. He Himself descends to me
and makes me capable of communing with Him. I immerse myself in Him, losing
myself as it were; and yet, under His loving gaze, my soul gains strength and power
and an awareness that it loves and is especially loved. It knows that the Mighty One
protects it. Such prayer, though short, benefits the soul greatly, and whole hours of
ordinary prayer do not give the soul that light which is given by a brief moment of this
higher form of prayer.
816 (207) + This afternoon, I had my first open-air rest [on the sunny veranda at the
sanatorium]. Sister Felicia 151 visited me today and brought a few necessary things
and some lovely apples and words of greeting from our beloved Mother Superior and
December 13, . Confession before Jesus.
817 When I reflected that I had not been to confession for more than three weeks, I wept
seeing the sinfulness of my soul and certain difficulties. I had not gone to confession
because the circumstances made it impossible. On the day of confessions, I had
been confined to bed. The following week, confessions were in the afternoon, and I
had left for the hospital that morning. This afternoon, Father Andrasz came into my
room and sat down to hear my confession. Beforehand, we did not exchange a single
word. I was delighted because I was extremely anxious to go to confession. As
usual, I unveiled my whole soul. Father gave a reply to each little detail. I felt
unusually happy to be able (208) to say everything as I did. For penance, he gave me
the Litany of the Holy Name of Jesus. When I wanted to tell him of the difficulty I have
in saying this litany, he rose and began to give me absolution. Suddenly his figure
became diffused with a great light, and I saw that it was not Father A., but Jesus. His
garments were bright as snow, and He disappeared immediately. At first, I was a little
uneasy, but after a while a kind of peace entered my soul; and I took note of the fact
that Jesus heard the confession in the same way that confessors do; and yet
something was wondrously transpiring in my heart during this confession; I couldn‟t at
first understand what it signified.
818 December 16, . I have offered this day for Russia. I have offered all my
sufferings and prayers for that poor country. After Holy Communion, Jesus said to
me, I cannot suffer that country any longer. Do not tie my hands, My daughter.
(209) I understood that if it had not been for the prayers of souls that are pleasing to
God, that whole nation would have already been reduced to nothingness. Oh, how I
suffer for that nation which has banished God from its borders!
819 + O inexhaustible spring of Divine Mercy, pour yourself out upon us! Your goodness
knows no limits. Confirm, O Lord, the power of Your mercy over the abyss of my
misery, for You have no limit to Your mercies. Wonderful and matchless is Your
mercy, astonishing the human and angelic mind.
820 My Guardian Angel told me to pray for a certain soul, and in the morning I learned that
it was a man whose agony had begun that very moment. The Lord Jesus makes it
known to me in a special way when someone is in need of my prayer. I especially
know when my prayer is needed by a dying soul. This happens more often now than
it did in the past.
821 (210) The Lord Jesus gave me to know how very pleasing to Him is a soul who lives in
accordance with the will of God. It thereby gives very great glory to God….
822 I have come to understand today that even if I did not accomplish any of the things the
Lord is demanding of me, I know that I shall be rewarded as if I had fulfilled
everything, because He sees the intention with which I begin, and even if He called
me to Himself today, the work would not suffer at all by that, because He himself is the
Lord of both the work and the worker. My part is to love Him to folly; all works are
nothing more than a tiny drop before Him. It is love that has meaning and power and
merit. He has opened up great horizons in my soul – love compensates for the
823 December 17, . I have offered this day for priests. I have suffered more today
than ever before, both interiorly and exteriorly. I did not know it was possible to suffer
(211 ) so much in one day. I tried to make a Holy Hour, in the course of which my spirit
had a taste of the bitterness of the Garden of Gethsemane. I am fighting alone,
supported by His arm, against all the difficulties that face me like unassailable walls.
But I trust in the power of his name and I fear nothing.
824 In this seclusion, Jesus Himself is my Master. He Himself educates and instructs me.
I feel that I am the object of His special action. For His inscrutable purposes and
unfathomable decrees, He united me to Himself in a special way and allows me to
penetrate His incomprehensible mysteries. There is one mystery which unites me
with the Lord, of which no one – not even angels – may know. And even if I wanted to
tell of it, I would not know how to express it. And yet, I live by it and will live by it for
ever. This mystery distinguishes me from every other soul here on earth or in eternity.
825 (212) + O bright and clear day on which all my dreams will be fulfilled; O day so
eagerly desired, the last day of my life! I look forward with joy to the last stroke the
Divine Artist will trace on my soul, which will give my soul a unique beauty that will
distinguish me from the beauty of other souls. O great day, on which divine love will
be confirmed in me. On that day, for the first time, I shall sing before heaven and
earth the song of the Lord‟s fathomless mercy. This is my work and the mission which
the Lord has destined for me from the beginning of the world. That the song of my
soul may be pleasing to the Holy Trinity, do You, O Spirit of God, direct and form my
soul Yourself. I arm myself with patience and await Your coming, O merciful God, and
as to the terrible pains and fear of death, at this moment more than at any other time, I
trust in the abyss of Your (213) mercy and am reminding You, O merciful Jesus, sweet
Savior, of all the promises You have made to me.
826 This morning I had an adventure. My watch had stopped, and I did not know when to
get up, and I thought of what a misfortune it would be to miss Holy Communion. It
was still dark, so I had no way of knowing whether it was time to get up. I dressed,
made my meditation and went to the chapel, but everything was still locked, and
silence reigned everywhere. I steeped myself in prayer, especially for the sick. I now
see how much the sick have need of prayer. Finally, the chapel was opened. I found
it difficult to pray because I was already feeling very exhausted, and immediately after
Holy Communion I returned to my room. Then I saw the Lord, who said to me, Know, My daughter, that the ardor of your heart is pleasing to Me. And just as you desire ardently to become united with Me in Holy Communion, so too do I desire to give Myself wholly to you; and as a (214) reward for your zeal, rest on My Heart. At that moment, my spirit was immersed in His Being, like a drop in a
bottomless ocean. I drowned myself in Him as in my sole treasure. Thus I came to