1301 It is extraordinary how Mother Irene has so much light from God concerning this whole matter. She was the first to allow me to carry out the Lord‟s wishes, although it was not until two years after the revelation that she became my superior. And despite this fact, she was the first to go with me when the painting of the image was first undertaken. And now again, when some things concerning the Divine Mercy are being published, and small holy cards are being printed, again it is she who is going with me [to take care of] this matter. God has ordained all this in a mysterious way, because this was begin in Vilnius, and now God‟s will has so directed the circumstances that this matter is being continued in Cracow. I know how pleasing this superior is to God; I see how God is directing everything and wants me to be under her protection during these important times…. Thank You, Lord, for such superiors, who live in the love (47) and fear of God. 293 That is why I pray for her most of all, because she has put herself out the most for the sake of this work of Divine Mercy….. 1302 September 29, [1937]. Today, I have come to understand many of God‟s mysteries. I have come to know that Holy Communion remains in me until the next Holy Communion. A vivid and clearly felt presence of God continues in my soul. The awareness of this plunges me into deep recollection, without the slightest effort on my part. My heart is a living tabernacle in which the living Host is reserved. I have never sought God in some far-off place, but within myself. It is in the depths of my own being that I commune with my God. 1303 My God, despite all the graces, I long without cease to be eternally united with my God; and the better I know Him, the more ardently I desire Him. + (48) J.M.J. 1304 With longing I gaze into the starlit sky, Into the sapphire of fathomless firmaments. There the pure heart leaps out to find You, O God, And yearns to be freed of the bonds of the flesh. With great longing, I gaze upon you, my homeland, When will this, my exile, come to an end? O Jesus, such is the call of Your bride Who suffers agony in her thirst for You. With longing, I gaze at the footprints of the saints Who crossed this wilderness on their way to the fatherland. They left me the example of their virtue and their counsels, And they say to me, “Patience, Sister, soon the fetters will break.” But my longing soul hears not these words. Ardently it yearns for its Lord and its God, And it understands not human language, Because it is enamored of Him alone. My longing soul, wounded with love, Forces its way through all created things (49) And unites itself with infinite eternity, With the Lord whom my heart has espoused. Allow my longing soul, O God, To be drowned in your Divine Three-fold Essence. Fulfill my desires, for which I humbly beg You, With a heart brimming with love‟s fire. 1305 A certain person came to the door today and asked to be admitted as one of our students. But she could not be admitted. She was in great need of our house. During the conversation which I had with her, the Passion of Jesus was renewed in me. When she 294 had gone, I undertook one of the severest mortifications. Nevertheless, the next time I will not let such a soul get away. For three days I suffered much on her account. How much I regret that our institutions are so small and that they cannot accommodate a greater number of souls. My Jesus, You know how much I grieve over every straying sheep….. 1306 (50) + O humility, lovely flower, I see how few souls possess you. Is it because you are so beautiful and at the same time so difficult to attain? O yes, it is both the one and the other. Even God takes great pleasure in her. The floodgates of heaven are open to a humble soul, and a sea of graces flows down upon her. O how beautiful is a humble soul! From her heart, as from a censer, rises a varied and most pleasing fragrance which breaks through the skies and reaches God Himself, filling His Most Sacred Heart with joy. God refuses nothing to such a soul; she is all-powerful and influences the destiny of the whole world. God raises such a soul up to His very throne, and the more she humbles herself, the more God stoops down to her, pursuing her with His graces and accompanying her at every moment with His omnipotence. Such a soul is most deeply united with God. O humility, strike deep roots in my whole being. O Virgin most pure, but also most humble, help me to attain deep (51 ) humility. Now I understand why there are so few saints; it is because so few souls are deeply humble. 1307 Eternal Love, Depth of Mercy, O Triune Holiness, yet One God, whose bosom is full of love for all, as a good Father You scorn no one. O Love of God, Living Fountain, pour Yourself out upon us, Yours unworthy creatures. May our misery not hold back the torrents of Your love, for indeed, there is no limit to Your mercy. 1308 + Jesus, I have noticed that You seem to be less concerned with me. Yes, My child, I am replacing Myself with your spiritual director [Father Andrasz]. He is taking care of you according to My will. Respect his every word as My own. He is the veil behind which I am hiding. Your director and I are one; his words are My words. 1309 (52) When I make the Way of the Cross, I am deeply moved at the twelfth station. Here I reflect on the omnipotence of God‟s mercy which passed through the Heart of Jesus. In this open wound of the Heart of Jesus I enclose all poor humans…. And those individuals whom I love, as often as I make the Way of the Cross. From that Fount of Mercy issued the two rays; that is, the Blood and the Water. With the immensity of their grace they flood the whole world……. 1310 When one is ill and weak, one must constantly make efforts to measure up to what others are doing as a matter of course. But even those matter-of-course things cannot always be managed. Nevertheless, thank You, Jesus, for everything, because it is not the greatness of the works, but the greatness of the effort that will be rewarded. What is done out of love is not small, O my Jesus, for Your eyes see everything. (53) I do not know why I feel so terribly unwell in the morning; I have to muster all my strength to get out of bed, sometimes even to the point of heroism. The thought of Holy Communion gives me back a little more strength. And so, the day starts with a struggle and ends with a struggle. When I go to take my rest, I feel like a soldier returning from the battlefield. You alone, my Lord and Master, know what this day has contained. 1311 Meditation. During meditation, the sister on the kneeler next to mine keeps coughing and clearing her throat, sometimes without a break. It occurred to me once that I might take 295 another place for the time of the meditation, because Mass had already been offered. But then I thought that if I did change my place, the sister would notice this and might feel hurt that I had moved away from her. So I decided to continue in prayer in my usual place, (54) and to offer this act of patience to God. Toward the end of the meditation, my soul was flooded with God‟s consolation, and this to the limit of what my heart could bear; and the Lord gave me to know that if I had moved away from that sister I would have moved away also from those graces that flowed into my soul.
1312 + Jesus came to the main entrance today, under the guise of a poor young man. This young man, emaciated, barefoot and bareheaded, and with his clothes in tatters, was frozen because the day was cold and rainy. He asked for something hot to eat. So I went to the kitchen, but found nothing there for the poor. But, after searching around for some time, I succeeded in finding some soup, which I reheated and into which I crumbled some bread, and I gave it to the poor young man, who ate it. As I was taking the bowl from him, he gave me to know that He was the Lord of heaven and earth. When I saw Him as He was, He vanished from my sight. (55) When I went back in and reflected on what had happened at the gate, I heard these words in my soul: My daughter, the blessings of the poor who bless Me as they leave this gate have reached My ears. And your compassion, within the bounds of obedience, has pleased Me, and this is why I came down from My throne to taste the fruits of your mercy. 1313 O my Jesus, now everything is clear to me, and I understand all that has just happened. I somehow felt and asked myself what sort of a poor man is this who radiates such modesty. From that moment on, there was stirred up in my heart and even purer love toward the poor and the needy. Oh, how happy I am that my superiors have given me such a task! I understand that mercy is manifold; one can do good always and everywhere and at all times. An ardent love of God sees all around itself constant opportunities to share itself through deed, word and prayer. Now I understand (56) the words which You spoke to me, O Lord, some time ago. 1314 + Oh, what great efforts I must make to carry out my duties well when my health is so poor! This will be known to You alone, O Christ. 1315 + In times of interior desolation I do not lose my peace, because I know that God never abandons a soul, except perhaps only when the soul itself breaks the bond of love by its unfaithfulness. However, all creatures without exception depend on the Lord and are maintained by His omnipotence. Some are under the rule of love, others under the rule of justice. It depends on us under which rule we want to live, because no one is refused the aid of sufficient grace. I am not frightened at all by my apparent abandonment. I examine myself more profoundly to discover whether this is due to my fault. If this is not the case – then may [the Lord] be blessed!
1316 (57) October 1, 1937. Daughter, I need sacrifice lovingly accomplished, because that alone has meaning for Me. Enormous indeed are the debts of the world which are due to Me; pure souls can pay them by their sacrifice, exercising mercy in
spirit. 1317 I understand Your words, Lord, and the magnitude of the mercy that ought to shine in my soul. Jesus: I know, My daughter, that you understand it and that you do 296 everything within your power. But write this for the many souls who are often
worried because they do not have the material means with which to carry out an
act of mercy. Yet spiritual mercy, which requires neither permission nor
storehouses, is much more meritorious and is within the grasp of every soul. If a
soul does not exercise mercy somehow or other, it will not obtain My mercy on the day of judgment. Oh, if only souls knew how to gather eternal treasure for
themselves, they would not be judged, for they would forestall My judgment with
their mercy. 1318 (58) October 10, [1937]. O my Jesus, in thanksgiving for Your many graces, I offer You my body and soul, intellect and will, and all the sentiments of my heart. Through the vows, I have given myself entirely to You; I have then nothing more than I can offer you. Jesus said to me, My daughter, you have not offered Me that which is really yours. I probed deeply into myself and found that I love God with all the faculties of my soul and, unable to see what it was that I had not yet given to the Lord, I asked, “Jesus, tell me what it is, and I will give it to You at once with a generous heart.” Jesus said to me with kindness, Daughter, give Me your misery, because it is your exclusive property. At that moment, a ray of light illumined my soul, and I saw the whole abyss of my misery. In that same moment I nestled close to the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus with so much trust that even if I had the sins of all the damned weighing on my conscience, I would not have doubted God‟s mercy (59) but, with a heart crushed to dust, I would have thrown myself into the abyss of Your mercy. I believe, O Jesus, that you would not reject me, but would absolve me through the hand of Your representative. 1319 You expired, Jesus, but the source of life gushed forth for souls, and the ocean of mercy opened up for the whole world. O Fount of Life, unfathomable Divine Mercy, envelop the whole world and empty Yourself out upon us.
1320 At three o'clock, implore My mercy, especially for sinners; and, if only for a brief moment, immerse yourself in My Passion, particularly in My abandonment at the moment of agony. This is the hour of great mercy for the whole world. I will allow you to enter into My mortal sorrow. In this hour, I will refuse nothing to the soul that makes a request of me in virtue of My Passion……. (60) J. M. J. 1321 Hail, most merciful Heart of Jesus, Living Fountain of all graces, Our sole shelter, our only refuge; In You I have the light of hope. Hail, most compassionate Heart of my God, Unfathomable living Fount of Love From which gushes life for sinful man And the Spring of all sweetness. Hail, open Wound of the Most Sacred Heart, From which the rays of mercy issued forth And from which it was given us to draw life With the vessel of trust alone. 297 Hail, God‟s goodness, incomprehensible, Never to be measured or fathomed, Full of love and mercy, though always holy, Yet, like a good mother, ever bent o'er us. Hail, Throne of Mercy, Lamb of God, Who gave Your life in sacrifice for me, Before whom my soul humbles itself daily, Living in faith profound. [End of Notebook Four] 298

Sister Faustina of the Blessed Sacrament of the Congregation of the Sisters of Our Lady of Mercy

Notebook V

NOTEBOOK V 299 + (1 ) J. M. J. 1322 The barque of my life sails along Amid darkness and shadows of night, And I see no shore; I am sailing the high seas. The slightest storm would drown me, Engulfing my boat in the swirling depths, If You Yourself did not watch over me, O God, At each instant and moment of my life. Amid the roaring waves I sail peacefully, trustingly, And gaze like a child into the distance without fear, Because You, O Jesus, are my Light. Dread and terror is all about me, But within my soul is peace more profound than the depths of the sea, For he who is with You, O Lord, will not perish; Of this Your love assures me, O God. Though a host of dangers surround me, None of them do I fear, for I fix my gaze on the starry sky, And I sail along bravely and merrily, As becomes a pure heart. And if the ship of my life sails so peacefully, This is due to but one thing above all: You are my helmsman, O God. This I confess with utmost humility. + (2) J. M. J. 1323 O my God, I love You. Sister Faustina Of the Blessed Sacrament. Cracow, October 20, 1937. 1324 + I bow down before You, O Bread of Angels, With deep faith, hope and love And from the depths of my soul I worship You, Though I am but nothingness. I bow down before you, O hidden God And love You with all my heart. 300 The veils of mystery hinder me not at all; I love You as do Your chosen ones in heaven. I bow down before You, O Lamb of God Who take away the sins of my soul, Whom I receive into my heart each morn, You who are my saving help. + (3) J. M. J. Cracow, October 20, 1937. Fifth Notebook 1325 O my God, let everything that is in me praise You, my Lord and Creator; and with every beat of my heart I want to praise Your unfathomable mercy. I want to tell souls of Your goodness and encourage them to trust in Your mercy. That is my mission, which You Yourself have entrusted to me, O Lord, in this life and in the life to come. 1326 We are beginning an eight-day retreat today. 215 Jesus, my Master, help me to make these holy retreat exercises with the greatest fervor possible. May Your Spirit guide me, O God, into the most profound depths of knowledge of Yourself, and of my own self as well. For I shall love You only as much as I shall come to know You. And I shall despise myself only as much as I shall come to known my misery. I know, Lord, that You will not refuse me Your help. I desire to come out of this retreat a saint, even though human (4) eyes will not notice this, not even those of the superiors. I abandon myself entirely to the action of Your grace. Let Your will be accomplished entirely in me, O Lord.
1327 First day. Jesus: My daughter, this retreat will be an uninterrupted contemplation. I will bring you into this retreat as into a spiritual banquet. Close to My merciful Heart, you will meditate upon all the graces your heart has received, and a deep peace will accompany your soul. I want the eyes of your soul to be always fixed on My holy will, since it is in this way that you will please Me most. No sacrifices can be compared to this. Throughout all the exercises you will remain close to My Heart. You shall not undertake any reforms, because I will dispose of your whole life as I see fit. The priest who will preach the retreat will not speak a single word which will trouble you. 1328 My Jesus, I have already made two meditations, and I recognize, through them, that everything You have said is true. I am experiencing a profound peace, (5) and this peace flows from the witness of my conscience; that is to say, that I am always doing Your will, O Lord. 1329 In the meditation on the goal of man, I understood that this truth is deeply rooted in my soul, and that my deeds are therefore the more perfect. I know why I was created. All creatures taken together cannot take the place, for me, of my Creator. I know that God is my ultimate goal and so, in whatever I undertake, I take God into account. 1330 + Oh, how good it is to spend a retreat close to the most sweet heart of my God. I am in the wilderness with my Beloved. No one interrupts my sweet conversation with Him. 301 1331 Jesus, You Yourself have deigned to lay the foundations of my sanctity, as my cooperation has not amounted to much. You have taught me to set no store on the use and choice of created things, because my heart is, of itself, so weak. And this is why I have asked You, O my Master, to take no heed of the pain of my heart, (6) but to cut away whatever might hold me back from the path of love. I did not understand You, Lord, in times of sorrow, when You were effecting Your work in my soul; but today I understand You and rejoice in my freedom of spirit. Jesus Himself has seen to it that my heart has not been caught in the snares of any passion. I have come to know well from what dangers he has delivered me, and therefore my gratitude to my God knows no bounds. 1332 Second day. As I was meditating on the sin of the Angels and their immediate punishment, I asked Jesus why the Angels had been punished as soon as they had sinned. I heard a voice: Because of their profound knowledge of God. No person on earth, even though a great saint, has such knowledge of God as an Angel has. Nevertheless, to me who am so miserable, You have shown Your mercy, O God, and this, time and time again. You carry me in the bosom of Your mercy and forgive me every time that I ask Your forgiveness with a contrite heart. 1333 Profound silence engulfs my soul. Not a single cloud hides the sun from me. I lay myself (7) entirely open to its rays, that His love may effect a complete transformation in me. I want to come out of this retreat a saint, and this, in spite of everything; that is to say, in spite of my wretchedness, I want to become a saint, and I trust that God‟s mercy can make a saint even out of such misery as I am, because I am utterly in good will. In spite of all my defeats, I want to go on fighting like a holy soul and to comport myself like a holy soul. I will not be discouraged by anything, just as nothing can discourage a soul who is holy. I want to live and die like a holy soul, with my eyes fixed on You, Jesus, stretched out on the Cross, as the model for my actions, I used to look around me for examples and found nothing which sufficed, and I noticed that my state of holiness seemed to falter. But from now on, my eyes are fixed on You. O Christ, who are for me the best of guides, I am confident that You will bless my efforts. 1334 + In the meditation of sin, the Lord gave me to know all the malice of sin and the ingratitude that is contained in it. I feel within my soul a great aversion for even the smallest sin. (8) However, the eternal truths I have been meditating on do not bring even a shadow of disturbance or unrest into my soul. And although I take them very much to heart, my contemplation is not thereby interrupted. In this contemplation, it is not transports of the heart that I experience, but a depth of peace and a wonderful silence. Although my love is great, I experience an extraordinary equilibrium. Even receiving the Eucharist causes no feeling, but brings me to a depth of union where my love and God‟s love are fused together as one. 1335 + Jesus has made known to me that I should pray for the sisters who are making the retreat. During prayer, I learned of the struggle that some are undergoing, and I redoubled my prayers. 1336 + In this profound silence, I am better able to judge the condition of my soul. My soul is like clear water in which I can see everything: both my misery and the vastness of God‟s graces. And owing to this true knowledge of itself, my spirit is strengthened in deep humility. I expose my heart to the action of Your grace like a crystal exposed to the rays of the sun. (9) May Your image be reflected in it, O my God, to the extent that it is 302 possible to be reflected in the heart of a creature. Let Your divinity radiate through me. O You who dwell in my soul. 1337 As I was praying before the Blessed Sacrament and greeting the five wounds of Jesus, at each salutation I felt a torrent of graces gushing into my soul, giving me a foretaste of heaven and absolute confidence in God‟s mercy. 1338 As I write these words, I hear the cry of Satan: “She‟s writing everything, she‟s writing everything, and because of this we are losing so much! Do not write about the goodness of God; He is just!” And howling with fury, he vanished. 1339 O merciful God, You do not despise us, but lavish Your graces on us continuously. You make us fit to enter Your kingdom, and in Your goodness You grant that human beings may fill the places vacated by the ungrateful angels. O God of great mercy, who turned Your sacred gaze away from the rebellious angels and turned it upon contrite man, (10) praise and glory be to Your unfathomable mercy, O God who do not despise the lowly heart. 1340 My Jesus, despite these graces which You send upon me, I feel that my nature, ennobled though it be, is not completely stilled; and so I keep a constant watch. I must struggle with many faults, knowing well that it is not the struggle which debases one, but cowardice and failure. 1341 When one‟s health is poor, there is much one has to bear. For when one is ill, but not in bed, one is not considered to be ill. For many reasons, therefore, there are constant occasions for sacrifices, and sometimes big ones. I understand now that only in eternity will many things be revealed. But I also understand that if God demands a sacrifice, He does not withhold His grace, but gives it to the soul in abundance. 1342 My Jesus, let my sacrifice burn before Your throne in all silence, but with the full force of love, as I beg You to have mercy on souls. 1343 (11 ) Third day. In the meditation on death, I prepared myself as if for real death. I examined my conscience and searched all my affairs at the approach of death and, thanks be to grace, my affairs were directed toward that ultimate goal. This filled my heart with great gratitude to God, and I resolved to serve my God even more faithfully in the future. One thing alone is necessary: to put my old self to death and to begin a new life. In the morning, I prepared to receive Holy Communion as if it were to be the last in my life, and after Holy Communion I brought before my imagination my actual death, and I said the prayers for the dying and then the De Profundis for my own soul. My body was lowered into the grave, and I said to my soul, “See what has become of your body, a heap of dirt teeming with vermin – that is your inheritance.” 1344 O merciful God, who still allow me to live, give me strength that I may live a new life, the life of the spirit, over which death has no dominion. And with that, my heart was renewed, and I began a new life while still here on earth, a life of love of God. Nevertheless, I do not forget that (12) I am weakness itself, though I do not doubt even for a moment that I will obtain the help of Your grace, O God. 303 1345 + Fourth day. O Jesus, I have been feeling extraordinarily well, close to Your Heart, during this retreat. Nothing disturbs the depths of my peace. With one eye, I gaze on the abyss of my misery, and with the other, on the abyss of Your mercy.
1346 During Holy Mass, which was celebrated by Father Andrasz, I saw the Infant Jesus who, with hands outstretched toward us, was sitting in the chalice being used at Holy Mass. After gazing at me penetratingly, He spoke these words: As you see Me in this chalice, so I dwell in your heart. 1347 + Holy Confession. After giving an account of my conscience, I was given the permission I asked for: To wear the bracelet for half an hour every day during Holy Mass, and in times of difficulty, to wear the belt for two hours. [Father said,] “Sister, persevere in this great faithfulness to the Lord Jesus.” 1348 (13) Fifth day. When I entered the chapel this morning, I learned that Mother Superior has had some trouble on my account. This hurt me very much. After Holy Communion, I leaned my head on the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus and said, “O my Lord, I beg You, let all the consolation that I am experiencing through Your presence in my heart be poured out into the soul of my dear Mother Superior, who has had some trouble because of me, and this involuntarily on my part.” 1349 Jesus comforted me, saying that both our souls had benefited from this. But I begged the Lord to deign to spare me from being the occasion of anyone‟s suffering, as my heart could not bear this. 1350 O white Host, You preserve my soul in whiteness; I fear the day when I might forsake You. You are the Bread of Angels, and thus also the Bread of Virgins. 1351 Jesus, my most perfect model, with my eyes